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Showing posts with the label humour

The Resit Test

by Lisa Kwan Written for: The Writer's Tower   Theme: Irony (March) Medal Words: seductive, goblet The lecturer had been nervous all day, wondering how and when she was going to tell them. Would they be upset? Would they cry? Would they be angry? Or worse, would they complain about her to their faculty deans and get her in trouble? But she had to tell them; she just had to. Probably at the end, when they had less time to....kill her. Throughout the lesson, she had tried to act as normal as she could. Students had asked her questions about class work, she had answered. A student made a joke, she laughed, albeit a little restrained. Finally, it was the last ten minutes of the lesson. She had to do it—now or never. “Guys, there's something I have to tell you. It's about your test.” The class immediately quietened, and she could see (and somehow feel ) all eyes on her. Her heart began to thump again, an erratic drum beat in her ears. “Th...

Someone I Admierer

by Lisa Kwan Written for: The Writer's Tower Theme: Comedy (October) XXX Univeresty Asignement 3: Essy Marks: 50 Someone I Admierer By Li Yan There are many poeple in this world. Some people are good people, but some people are the bad people. Good people is good for the world. They is make the world good. But the bad people always making the world bad. always got the fight and killing and cut the queue. I think that the bad people is bad and not good in the world. On the other hand, more and more good people should become, so world is more good. One people is the someone I admier, she is my teachr. There have three reason I like she: beatifull, clever and good. My teacher techer she name is Miss Ling. She is very beatiful. She is most beatidful techer in the world. She eyes round and big. Like a moon. She got a small nose too. Small nose is very cut. She also have a face. She face is magic. I see she face, I smil smell. She smell, I also can smell. She...

Summer Sling

by Lisa Kwan Written for: The Writer's Tower Theme: Summer (September) Bonus words: chewing gum , ice bucket I stood naked on the beach, everyone staring, laughing, pointing. Or at least it felt that way. I don’t know how I let my idiotic friend convince me that swim briefs were the way to get chicks. “Bro, chicks dig the banana sling, bro. Easier for them to assess , if you know what I mean,” he winked at me. That lame-ass response and wink (who still winks, between dudes no less?!?!) would have been a warning foghorn if I weren’t so desperate. And then that lying two-faced bastard had worn swim shorts. “You….look…. fabulous , bro. Real fab!” He’d greeted me, wiping tears of mirth from his eyes. Which didn’t last long because, in the next moment his face was buried in the hot sand as I tackled him and punched—as hard as I could—where it would hurt him the most. He groaned so loudly, the people around us turned to look. I ignored his whimpers as I stood up...

Parents' Day Out for Valentine's

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My parents are the cutest things, ever! Really, they are! ;) Yesterday, they went on a date for Valentine's Day. Well, they  usually  go for dinner, just the two of them. They have, ever since the bros and I were, well, old enough to stay at home alone, unsupervised. (Which is a very long time ago, I assure you.) But I don't know why, just felt excited for this one. Maybe because I wasn't busy thinking about or getting ready for my own  date for Valentine's. Aheh. (Baby, hurry up and come back from India, okay? T.T) Since I spent so much time getting my mum to try on different outfits so she'd look nice for their date, I told my dad to go change out of his plain mustard t-shirt into something nicer, or into one that at least matched mum's pink suit. So he changed into a purple t-shirt. Well, okay la.  Good boy! xD My dad so formal la  with his arms  behind his back. @.@ And I think my mum looked really pretty! Couldn't help feeling a littl...

This Old Man

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I grew up with nursery rhymes. I don't remember actually learning them in kindergarten, but give me one line, and I'll be able to tell you the rest. Well, most of it anyway. I guess Tadika Kiddyhouse did a good job in teaching kids their nursery rhymes. (No, no, no understanding needed. Just rote memorization! Good job!) :D I can remember every word to "Hey Diddle Diddle". If you ask me nicely I can sing it for you :) Hey Diddle diddle The cat and the fiddle The cow jumped over the moon The little dog laughed to see such sport And the dish ran away with the spoon. One question though: Have you ever wondered what these children's nursery rhymes mean? We've always accepted the unacceptable in nursery rhymes. How a cat learned to play a fiddle, how a cow can jump over the moon, how a dog can laugh, and how dishes can elope with spoons. But one nursery rhyme that's kinda got me stumped is "This Old Man." This old man, he played one...

Check Me Out!

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Another fashion post ahead! :D Wore this outfit to church one Sunday. Was feeling cheerful and bersemangat  so I wore something that looked like I had put a little more effort into it than usual :P Ta-daaaa! Overall look :) Purple contact lenses yo! My friend has told me that this pair makes me look scary, but somehow, I love them! Don't they look absolutely gorgeous ? :D (Am I supposed to state where I got them too? =.=) They're Korean, called Fairy Violet; got them from a friend of mine.  Cost me just RM 38 to last me a year! :) Oh, and those chilli red diamond-shaped ear rings were from one of the  shops selling them at "3 for RM10" at Sg. Wang. (I love them when my outfit is plain and I just need some bright colour! :D) Checked blouse: brandless. A gift from dear Sandra again! :) Indigo-blue mini skirt: Fourskin. Also given to me by Sandra :P View from the top! (Not like it's a very long way down, you know,  being vertically-challenged and all =.=) Ful...

Hair Keys

I am going to tell you something. Something that you CANNOT tell anyone else. I mean it. Nobody. I'm trusting you to keep it a secret. So don't you go betraying me now. It took a lot of me to even tell you this, aite? So. Yeah. *deep breath* The other day, I had my Praise Exercise in the morning (it's exercise routines accompanied by Chinese Christian music--not as vigorous as aerobics, but not as relaxed as tai chi ). Praise exercise was just over, so all the aunties were sitting around cooling off. Some were milling about, some were just chatting, gossiping. After a good one hour plus of stretching and jumping and running around, I was all hot and sweaty. I was wiping my sweat off my brow with the back of my hand. Then I noticed my glasses had this print of something. A fingerprint, or whatever. A print of something , smudged on the lens. So I took them off with the intention of wiping off whatever print that was with the edge of my blouse. (Don...

My Perfect Match

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The first time I saw her, I fell head over heels in love with her. Ah, her. She was absolutely perfect. I could just close my eyes and imagine........ She had the most romantic, shining eyes. They seemed to reflect the full moon that was shining so brightly on the night that I first met her. And her body. Whoa, did she have a hot one! Those slim and slender legs--they practically took my breath away! And when she walked past me, my eyes could not help but follow the curves along the lines of her back, all the way down to her a-- Ahem. Sorry.  Oh, and she had the daintiest feet I had ever seen! They were small, and pretty, and reminded me of fairies and pixies. When she finally turned her head over her shoulder to look back at me, her eyes completely captivated me. I was mesmerized. And then I heard the most beautiful sound in the world--the smallest purr, that stopped my heart. It sounded oh-so-inviting. As if she were telling me that I actually, had a shot at this. D...