Friday, March 13, 2009

The Day

The Day had arrived.
After a week of fretting over it, worrying about it, freaking out because of it, it was finally here.
The Day – on which I was to do 3 presentations – was here. Today.
This was The Day when everything had to be great, all right, perfect.
But I made mistake after mistake after mistake.
I woke up slightly later than usual, on The Day when I should be getting up earlier than usual. Darn alarm...I put it to snooze mode too easily. Had to dress nicely, planned to put on makeup – appearance does count for something.
Then I was stupid enough – seriously reeeaaallllyyyy DUMB – to think that I could walk to my faculty in high heels. As if the last time I had done that wasn’t torture enough. The last time, I cut my left foot because the straps of my heels keep rubbing against my skin. It really did bleed. I told myself I would never, ever walk in my high heels again.
Apparently, I have short-term memory.
Because I wore it.
I had not even walked past the mosque before my eyes had started tearing. I am totally serious. They were not tears of joy, I assure you. It was honest-to-goodness tears of pain. My feet were hurting so bad I could not help the tears. Adding to the pain was the fact that I was also carrying my heavy laptop in a backpack which made for extra weight on my feet and heels.
I looked at my watch. 7.50 am. There was no time to turn back now. I would definitely be late for class. It takes a little over ten minutes to reach my faculty. I had no time. I forced myself to keep walking, ignoring the shooting pain in my ankles.
Past the mosque, I suddenly stopped dead in my tracks.
I had left my presentation script back in my room.
I thought about it. Could I present without my script?
I turned round and walked back, silently (or not so silently) cursing myself all the way, the pain in my heels like a knife jabbing me in the butt. Sigh.
Climbing up those @#$^$%#$^ steps to my hostel room in those #$%&^%$* heels nearly killed me. Grabbed my #$%&^^&$* script and threw those $%^&^%$ pair of heels aside in favour of my flat, ugly covered-shoes which I should have worn in the first place for practical and realistic reasons.
And I did all that with such vigour and "enthusiasm" I kinda scared my room mate (she confessed to me later saying that I looked so mad she didn't dare say a word for fear of unleashing hell's fury).
Walking past the mosque for the second time now, I glance at my watch. 8.05 am. Crap.
What on earth was wrong with me today???!!!
I couldn't help it. I cried. Again. Not tears of joy for sure, but it was not tears of pain either. This time, they were tears of anger. I was angry with myself mostly, for doing this to myself.
Of all the days that I could have been late, it had to be The Day. When every little thing mattered.
By the time I reached the classroom, the lecturer was already there, everyone was seated and it seemed like they were all waiting for me. And what a state to arrive in.
The top I had on especially for my presentation that morning was completely drenched in my sweat from all that furious walking. My hair, which I had initially planned to let down, was now very obviously hastily tied up and messy. It made me look like I had gone crazy with a comb or something. I was panting, and flushed with embarrassment as well.
How could I let my group members down like that? I was supposed to be early to set up the laptop and get the slide presentation ready. But. Sigh. Horrible feeling. :(
It took me some time to calm down. I apologized to my lecturer. And began.
I stumbled over the first few lines.
And then, it was all smooth sailing from there.
Seriously, I thought my group presentation for Teaching Profession that morning went extremely well.
Considering my god-awful start of The Day, everything went very, very well indeed. Thank God.
I can't believe it. :)
1 down, 2 more to go.
2nd presentation for Decision Making went all right. He gave us an A- on the spot!! :P
2 down, 1 more to go.
3rd presentation for TITAS (Tamadun Islam dan Tamadun Asia) went well too.
It was over. It was finally OVER.
It seemed like a never-ending day of stress and anxiety. But everything turned out all right in the end. :)
Phew. *relief*
You know, I had this really craaaazzzyyyy dream! I had 3 presentations in 1 freakin' day!! Then I forgot to bring my script and....
Oh, wait. It wasn't a dream. >.<


The Bee said...

oh awful start for the day
got my heart rate spiking a bit
and as i read on... thank God for His mercies!!!
lessons to be learned huh???
* those shoes are NOT made for walking loh....
* a neat image should suffice
its the "lieu" - the stuff in cantonese or content which matters ok??
* have an early night before esp with so much crammed in the next day (not your choice!)
* put the alarm on study table away from convenient touch to snooze...
and cast all our anxieties on Him who cares for you??? sense a little high level and also in expectation fr yourself n gp??
rmbr...enjoy the fruit of your labour ie your presentations...
try not to let the anxiety overtake the joy that should come with the accomplishment loh
good job s finished
congrats dear!!!! SYABAS
PS. so your poor feet taken care of already??

chingZ said...

Sorry but I laughed when I read this > "the pain in my heels like a knife jabbing me in the butt." ...

Lisa ^^, said...

>>The Bee
Well, I'm okay already la. But my feet get tired more easily than usual now. Sigh. And there's a scar on my left foot that's been there since the last semester and now, I've cut it at the exact same spot. I don't think the scar will ever go away now. :(

ahaha It was meant to be funny. Didn't want it to be a too serious post. But, it did hurt like h***!!!! >.<

siawase_tenshi said...

Despite a series of unfortunate (read:PAINFUL) events, you did GREAT Lisa~ ^^

Arnan Koh said...

It is wonderful that you managed to all of that in one day. Your mom seems to have a lot to say about your feet... hope they are okay..

~`w!L`Li@m'~ said...

It's Friday the 13th! What were you thinking?
Sigh.....well, dear, you are not the only one having a screwed up day. I had my share today.
My results were out....though I passed all but I didn't do as well as I wanted to...Yup, didn't get my A's. And NO! It's not ok! I was so depressed the whole day...felt like banging my head on the wall. WHY!!!??? I guess the only person to blame is to work way way waaaaaayyyyy harder next time!

Anonymous said...

well.. felt the pain as me too just cut BOTH my skin at the back of the feet (two very big & fresh cut) 2 days ago... i wore d shoes whole day.. I was silly enuf to tink tht by wearing socks tis time, (after d 1st time i hurt both of d same spot too) I'd not get any hurt. But i'm Wrong! stupid silly me too! aiks..

Anyway, congrats on ur presentations! =) it's ur hard work tht makes d flow of presentations went well.. great job! =)

bEatRice.. said...

AWW..funny yet i could almost feel the pain too!! tried it before! and yes, i felt like walking barefooted instead!! hahaha