Friday, December 31, 2010

The Last Day of 2010 Already?

It's the last day of 2010.




I always used to find it so amusing that when it was January, I would wish it was December (maybe cos of holidays and Christmas? *shrugs*) and groan about how long it will be before then.


Then when it is the end of year, I wonder how time can pass by that quickly when it still feels like September, or something. =.=






I've been blog-hopping and, with the end of the year coming fast, everyone's been writing a "2010 in a nutshell" or "My 2010" or "My 2010 in one post" or "10 Most Important Things Happened in 2010" -- basically a recap of what they've done/accomplished in the past year.




It's a good tradition to have. In fact, my church has an annual Watch Night service on the last day of the year --a very reflective and solemn service-- to ring in the New Year with a heart of gratitude for everything that has happened in the past year, good or bad, and start the coming year with renewed hope in life. :)






However, I don't feel like doing a "My 2010 in a nutshell including the 10 most important things that happened" post. >.<


I do, however, wanna place all my hopes and expectations for the coming year, 2011, right here:




1) I have one year left of my Degree studies before I start my practical teaching in a school somewhere. Honestly, I'm terrified. It's so easy to say you want to do teaching, but whether you have the personality and the X-factor to be the kind of teacher you, and others, can be proud of is a different matter altogether. 


In the darkest of hours, I doubt myself. I doubt if I have what it takes to be a good teacher. I hope that by the end of this year 2011, I will have the confidence to be the best teacher I can be, before I face my students in the classroom, in the real world.




2) Leading the Varsity Choir has been a challenge, to say the least. I hope that I can do the best I can this semester, before I opt to "retire" and let the new ones take over. I hope that I can help the Choir grow in numbers and most of all, let Choir be a haven for people who just love music, and love to sing.




3) Studies are getting tougher and tougher. Subjects are more challenging. I hope that I will never take for granted things that come easily to me (like proficiency in the language) and push myself to do better. My grade point average has been slowly increasing (thank God for that) and I hope that I can maintain it, and better myself these last two semesters. :)




4) I find myself whining a lot, complaining a lot, especially in things that are out of my control and caused by higher powers, if you know what I mean. (But trust me, you would too if you were me.) But I've learned that complaining never changes anything. So I hope that this year, I will constantly remind myself that instead of wasting my breath, to channel the energy into something more productive. I guess I also need to control my anger now. I never used to be this irritable >.< (!! How can I not when these people are just idio- Okay, take a deep breath. *inhale* *exhale*)




5) I want to write more stories. I have been procrastinating, or placed priorities on everything else but writing. Last holidays I was supposed to write at least one story, but I ended up with none. I complain of no time, when I know, deep down, I had ample. I hope I can manage my time in a way that I can actually make time to do something I love.




6) I feel a slight shift in my friendships. Things have been different this semester due to particular circumstances, and I find myself feeling depressed and, horror of horrors, lonely. Like I've never felt before. :( Well, nothing much I can do about it. But I hope that I won't hold it against my friends, but instead, find a way to be happy being by myself.




7) My relationship with a certain someone is slowly growing. :) It took us a long time to get to where we are, and things are only just beginning to take a turn for the better. I just want to learn to place this relationship in the hands of the Big Guy and pray for the best. I've learned a lot from him, and from being with him. I hope that both of us will grow as individuals, and as a couple, in maturity and love. :D






I guess that's a lot of hope and expectations for the new year, no? 


But I realize that everything I've said concerns my personal growth. I guess I never saw the year as a time frame in which to accomplish certain feats, or to put a tick on my "Things To Do Before I Die" list. (Not that that's wrong. >.<)


I didn't have a chance to travel out of the country. I didn't meet an international celebrity, or have an opportunity to talk to them. I didn't go bungee-jumping. I never went snorkeling or diving on a beautiful island. :(


But I guess, it shouldn't matter, should it? Doesn't mean my year was a complete waste :)


I guess I see the year as another chance at growing and learning as a person. Very cheesy and corny-sounding, I know. But maybe that's me. :D








May this coming year be another filled with love and joy, and despite the inevitable sadness and pain of life, may we push ourselves to pick ourselves up and move on, and emerge stronger than ever. May we appreciate the time we have to perseveringly grow and work on our weaknesses to be the best kind of person we can be.


Here's me, wishing you:


Happy New Year, everyone ! :D

1 comment:

Mr Lonely said...

happy new year 2011 !! =D